And they didn't even know it. April 30th of 1492, our good friend and mass murderer slash slaver Christopher "The D*ck" Columbus received the commission to explore the Indies through the Atlantic from the Queen and King of Spain. Now, I'm not one to make jokes about Genocide. However I'm known for making fun of Genociders (Ed- Thats not a word is it?). I mean, come on. Hitler was a raging homosexual. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Oh besides the fact that he tried exterminating them too. Sorry Nazis but you could be tough, you could be organized, but your boss was the most FABULOUS vegetarian artist turned mass murderer, like, EVEEEER!
Ok but back on topic, even though Columbus didn't kill a bagazillion billion billion Indians on purpose, he did indeed deal in Indian forced labor. And thats a pretty dastardly thing to do. No one likes to be enslaved, specially by some short white guy with a fruity Italian accent. But the man seems to be a nearly accidental killing machine, introducing European diseases onto the Indians, and this one is soooooo much better yet way less well known, ahem, listen to this...
His crew apparently brought back Syphillis to Europe, which may have caused upwards to 5 million deaths. Not only that, but they also brought a plethora of brand new Veneral diseases which were ALL the rage among the ruling elites... and the whores. And pretty much half the population of Europe, including the goats (Ed-You're going to hell for this. You bastard). In fact, if you count the people that died as a consequence of his discovery, then you can count LITERALLY everyone to die since 1492 on the new world, and countless in Europe, including World War one, World War two, and any curent wars that might be going on.
God the guy puts Hitler to shame. I mean this is long term extermination. I hereforth pass a motion to name today, March 30th, Everything in the future is about to go to [crap] because of Columbus, that jerk day.
What Do You Want to Learn
13 years ago
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Columbus was a dick no doubt. And not only to the indians but to his own crew! On the boat he used to punish his sailors by tying a rope all the way around the bottom of the boat, tying the sailors to that rope, and basically dragging their bodies across the sides and bottom of the boat (yeah underwater) Who the hell likes this guy? He just discovered america by accident, I say we forget him and give credit back to the eskimos and the vikings.
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